Ridiculous

what a ridiculous day
a sonnet* for me he wrote
what a ludicrious thought
a song** for me he sang
isn’t it quite preposterous?
he called me beautiful
addleheaded he must be
“you are wonderful” he said
and then I start to believe.
for me he wanted to pray
how unusual and rare
leaning in for a long embrace***
if only the absurd could remain.

*not often are the finest things found, shared.
(there are those who bravely, nightly find
the moon and those who sometimes do.) I cared
more for the moon tonight (when you remind
me moonward, a face half-hid and hung low,
turned close as sky, I see…) the moon you caught
first then shared, you thought moon enough to slow
and stop with me, to offer the unsought
heavenly. (I will not compare you and moon:
excellencies each, both make words seem few;
but too sometimes since and not any sometimes soon
will I find a fellow moon-watcher.) you
with your moon just over shoulder remind:
the nearest look beside, the finest find.

**No one is alone
Hard to see the light now
Just don't let it go
Things will come out right now
We can make it so

***theater hug- (n.) {from the Latin "hugum theatricus."
"hugum" being the act of holding while allowing oneself to be held.
"theatricus" meaning marked with the sincerity and playfulness of those who practice being real in the moment.}
An embrace, a true one, an event unto itself.
To listen by holding.
When two people wrap their arms around each other and hold tightly till both feel thoroughly held. (People need to feel that.)
An embrace of duration, one that takes time.
In fact, as long as necessary till both parties drop their defenses,
till neither can persist in the belief that they are alone.
Sometimes one or both will whisper precisely what they know the other needs most to hear; often no words are needed at all.

The opposite of a Baptist hug.
Baptist hug- (n.) an unfulfilling event where two people stand three feet apart then lean treacherously otherward to pat the other in non-discussed but nonetheless agreed-upon safe areas.
Baptists don't like to remember that they have bodies, that they are good, that God once got himself a body just so He could actually touch some of his children.

Why?

Why did God give me…
Only to take away?
Why—for a while—can’t things seem to stay?

I don’t know. I may never.
It’s not for me to figure God out—just to trust.

But I’m starting to see
God gives as He sees fit—this is only the start of it.
He will surpass expectations, surprise
meet every need.

Thank You

Thank you is not enough to say
to God for surprising me
with a certain story.
I don't know if/when/how
I'll tell it here,
but thanks to Otahyoni
and those who
listened to me tell it.

There's Gotta Be More

"If we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature or the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that Our Lord finds our desires, not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling around with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at sea. We are far too easily pleased."
--C.S. Lewis

More personal, soul mates

On Mick Sliva’s (very cool guy, WB editor, whom I interned under while at Focus) blog, http://www.yourwritersgroup.com/mywritersgroup/frivolity/index.html, he said, “It's strange blogging. It's like publishing your journal or taking your shirt off in front of the class.”
My thoughts exactly!

So here, at the risk of self-exposure, I post a more personal blog entry.

Sometimes I am very fearful that my “soul mate” has or will pass me by. While in a relationship, I fear that I’ll get attached, it won’t work out; failure and hurt again. What if he’s “the one” and I lose him?

What if I’m dating someone, and miss “the one?”
I think culture has encouraged us to fear marrying the wrong person.
I read an article today by Ryan Barnhart, called “Selling Our Soulmate” http://www.relevantmag.com/life_article.php?id=7103 that challenged preconceived notions about soul mates.

Barnhart says, “Finally, the best advice I received came from a pastor; he said, ‘Mass media of our modern culture has ruined the concept of a soul mate … ‘The one’ we should be looking for is Jesus, and then He’ll help us change so that we could make a marriage work with whomever.’That’s a strange concept: Marriage with anyone would work as long as we follow God’s guidelines and commit to living that out daily. It makes sense, though, because I have seen many people fall in and out of love faster than they change their socks. If we rely upon feeling in love, then that obviously doesn’t work.”

Love is a decision and not just a feeling.
My friend Denise’s blog, http://coloringgirl.blogspot.com/, often dialogues about these subjects. She says, “It is difficult not to think in terms of soulmates. It is the part of culture that has seeped in. Songs, movies, TV shows, and romance books perpetuate the myth.”
Denise adds, “A biblical relationship requires more effort. So does marriage. What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than happy? It is the question posed by Gary Thomas in his book Sacred Marriage.

Difficulty in marriage is inevitable—no matter if you’re married to your ‘soul mate’ or not.
I need to remember he won’t meet my needs or read my mind, that dating [and marriage, of course] won’t always be exciting and fun, that there will be hard times, miscommunication, and hurt feelings.

But you know what? That’s OK that he not meet my every need. It’s not about me. No human ever will complete me, nor should I expect him to.
Only Christ can complete me.
I’m still grasping to understand this concept. It will be a lifelong journey.

Tomlin Tops Dove Award Nominations.

The Gospel Music Assoc. (GMA) announced nominations for the 37th annual GMA Music Awards, also known as Dove Awards, to be held Apr. 5. Chris Tomlin led nominees with nine nods. David Crowder Band, Natalie Grant, Joy Williams, and Relient K followed with six nominations each. Switchfoot, Jeremy Camp, Casting Crowns, The Crabb Family, Israel Houghton, BarlowGirl, and Third Day received five nominations each. For a full list of nominees, click here.

26! The marathon year

I am very thankful to everyone who made it a memorable celebration.